Time...

This might be a long one, but bare with me guys, you will only have to deal with my posts once a week hahaha!

So anyway I guess I'll talk about how frustrating it is to sit at school, which you don't enjoy, learning about things you will never use in real life, and stressing about things you need to do to get out of this place. I know where I'm going to college, I know what I want to study, I know where I want to do my required internship, I know where I want to go for grad school after college, and I know where I want to work after grad school. I already know how my life is going to turn out, I already have the majority of it planned out, and I plan on doing every single thing I have planned in my head. Because that's who I am, I'm a planner, I plan something and envision it until its perfect, then I go do it. Some think its crazy but that's how I am, so deal with it. So therefore it's extremely hard for me to sit through class with idiotic kids who have no goals, its hard for me to study for a physics test (which I'm attempting to do now) that will mean absolutely nothing to me in the long run, since Broadcast Journalism has nothing to do with science. And it's extremely stressful that I need to make sure I pass AP Econ (which I hate... It's not easy like someone told me it was last year) so I can graduate and fulfill all my plans. It's hard and I just want to be done and move on to my next mission, I guess you could say.... BUT

My boss said something to me so out of the blue last week that made me really think about my life and how I'm currently living it. So every day I get up upset, upset that I have to get ready and go to school, when all I can think about is college and my classes I will actually enjoy, and my dorm, and the wonderful city I will be in with the perfect weather at all times, and the cool happy people who all there for a purpose to learn and succeed. So then I grudgingly get through the day but with all of that on my mind CONSTANTLY. I'm not living in the moment and I'm just trying to get by so I can move on to the next thing I have planned for my self. Well now you're probably wondering what my boss said, well anywhere here it is.

So out of no where she came out of her office to get something, I'm doing my work minding my own business and she says, "Franchesca, are you an over achiever?" I was so confused as to why she was asking me this, so hesitantly I replied with something along the lines of how sometimes, yes, I really can be an over achiever  So she said how she is too and that she had some advice for me. So I listened, she told me about how when she was my age she always wanted to get her current "project" done so she can move on to her next "project." She explained how she was so in a rush to get to college, once she got to college, she was so in a rush to graduate so she could get to Law School, once she got to Law School she was in such a rush to finish then pass the bar and become an attorney. She said that once she got where she wanted to end up she looked back and said "WOW." She told me how she wished she wasn't in such a hurry to get all her accomplishments done, and just enjoyed her moments. She said she did have fun during all that time, yet now looking back she doesn't feel she really took the time to just STOP and relax for a second to appreciate and enjoy all the moments throughout that whole journey. What she said to me just out of the blue has really resonated with me since she gave me that priceless advice. That really meant a lot that she took the time out of her busy attorney schedule to try to help a young person she saw as someone who was like herself, and just take the time and try to prevent her mistakes from happening to me.

And for those mere 5 minutes with her I am extremely grateful. Yes, I've always been told to stop and smell the flowers, to appreciate every moment of your life, and every other cheesy quote about appreciating time; yet it really took a successful woman who realized I reminded her of her younger self who stopped to just share her regrets in life to hopefully open my eyes and no let that happen to me. And that's exactly what she did. Instead of continuing on with my extremely severe Senioritis I was previously suffering from, I am now not going to be in such a rush to "get out of here" and just live day by day and appreciate the last few months of high school that I will never get back. Its been a hard year for me, but I know what I have to look forward to, and so instead of obsessing with all the things I COULD be doing instead of studying for this physics test, I'm going to just live in the moment and appreciate the time that I'm studying for this test. Graduation is going to come before I know it, and the last thing I want to have in my life are regrets. I am thankful that she stopped and said something to me, because I don't think I realized I have been doing EXACTLY what she described her whole life as. She described this as a regret, and regret that she would have just slowed down!

So, that's exactly what I'm going to do. I know what I'm going to do in life and what it takes to get there so I'm going to just relax and not rush through it, I'm going to enjoy every second and not constantly rush to the next thing I need to "check off" my list, because life isn't a list. Life is meant to be filled with experiences and lessons, that you take the time to appreciate and enjoy. So my Senioritis has been cured, of course I'm excited to graduate, but now there will be no rushing. So when I'm forty years old I don't look back regretting my choices, regretting the time I was wasting, to move on to my next task and rushing my life away. Because once you get to the place you were in such a hurry to get to, what do you have left? Nothing but the regrets of not enjoying the process it took to get there.