Today

Today my playlist was this:
-Paint it black by the Rolling Stones
-Black water by edward sharpe and the magnetic zeros
-Blackbird by the Beatles
(And other songs but that just goes to show black was on my mind)
Why was I so morbid today? Well I guess when one thing happens it just becomes a catalyst that brings to the a view that makes everything seem ugly. It was definitely a bad day. Well at least at school. And the actual learning wasn't the problem. It was the people. And I do not enjoy people at my school sometimes. They drive me crazy and I don't understand how I don't yell my head off at them every day. I mean not everyone at my school is bad but the majority of them are not appealing to me. Also, when I get in this morbid feeling all I can see is people is their ugly sides. And this really depresses me because I usually see the good sides in people and try to always look past the bad sides. So then it's not everyone who is the problem. It's me who is the problem and I find it extremely troubling because I mean this is not how I want to be. I only get like this sometimes but everytime I do it always leaves me in a lousy feeling. And I mean yes I understand I can change my ways but sometimes you can't. Something's are just a part of you and you can't change them and that's what bothers me the most. That's why I stayed up past midnight last night because I couldn't sleep. I could just sit there and think about my flaws in myself. Now that I have dumped this all on you all want to know the one reason that set off this terrible mood that turned into this terrible day? I was being a horrible girlfriend and getting sucked into my little phone games while I was spending the last moments with my boyfriend before I had to leave again. (He lives in sac so I don't see him all the time). And anyways he was sad over that. But that one thing just set off this huge thing which definitely goes to show I also have overreacting issues (which is another thing I do not think I can change). So ya that was my lovely day I had. Thanks for listening (reading-but listening sounds better to say).