These past few months i have been thinking A LOT about the future. Don't expect me to babble on about college, because it seems like everyone else did that enough. Yes, I'm worried about college, but I'm just concerned about where I'll end up and if I'll be good enough at whatever i want to do. I have dreams. i have ambitions. In this world, however, everything is so competitive. As of right now, i want to do something in fashion, and writing. Working for a top fashion magazine like Teen Vogue, Elle, Cosmo Girl or Nylon would be WONDERFUL. That's what i really want. I'm just overly drawn to that industry. I'm hoping to land an internship first, then go from there. The thing is, i know someone who wants to work for the fashion industry must be persistent. And that's not really me. I had a job for about 9 months, stopped working in the beginning of August, and haven't gotten a job since. I'm seventeen years old and don't even have a license. I want these things so bad, yet i don't try very hard to get them. I really need a reality check.
Besides all this, my life as of right now is taking a turn. I feel as if I'm slowly growing apart from my friends, because we all like to do different things. I am definitely growing apart from them but realizing that's okay. Of course I'll always need them, but not all the time. I find myself being too reliant on other people and i need to stop. Some of my friends were easier to hang around when we were kids. Now that we're almost adults, our relationship changes constantly. I always want to hold on to the people I've known for so long, but apart of me just wants to let go.
Maybe letting go isn't so bad sometimes.
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It is hard sometimes to be motivated to do things. Even if you have the strongest desire without action it doesn't matter. I have had to do this too, just find something that is going to make it all worth it. Look forward to how you will be rewarded for achiving that thing which you want desperetly. If we just stick with things and don't think of the long term part but taking one day at a time there is nothing we can not accomplish.
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